Monday, January 30, 2006

The Artists

As you can see, the children got tuckered out (yes, that sounds southern) so they sprawled out onto the floor.

Relaxing After the Artistic Work

Why were they so tired, you ask?

Take a guess.

1. Was it because they wrestled all day and needed to recoop?
2. Was it because I played tag with them and they chased me all over the house for 10 minutes?
3. Was it because they watched squirrels and birds all day which caused their tails to flick at a such a rapid pace that it wore them out?

While all of the above are true, their fatigue on this particular day happened to be because of arts and crafts. Yes, I said arts and crafts. Don't your cats help you with arts and crafts!? Mine do.

They helped me make a birthday card for Emily (Happy Birthday Em!).

Here's their work.

Homemade card

Notice how much bigger Neville is than Cambridge (he's the green and she's the pink), yet she still picks fights with him on a daily basis. She's nuts.

Here's proof that Cambridge helped out - I couldn't get it all the pink ink off and, consequentially, had little pink paw prints on my bathroom sink. She is the water whore, remember?

Evidence of Artistic Work
(Yes, I realize that I need a kid.)

Posted by Bird On A Line @ 7:26 AM

Sunday, January 29, 2006

It's Dangerous Driving By Target Every Weekend

Did I tell you that I started a class last week? I'm taking one of five science courses needed before I apply to grad school, so I'm starting with Human Anatomy and Physiology at a local community college (yes, I could go to Vanderbilt, but even with my staff discount it would be ridiculously expensive). So far it's okay. I've learned all of this stuff before (basic chemistry, cell structure and organelles, DNA transcription and translation, etc.) but I need it on the transcript to continue my education, so reviewing I will continue! I pass by a Target everytime I go to class (Friday nights - major bummer, let me tell you, and Saturday mornings - surprisingly less of a bummer for some reason) which is kind of dangerous because I like Target and always seem to find something that I need* there.

For example, this wallet.

Cool new wallet

Cute, huh? It's smaller than my previous wallet (which is why I needed** it). It looks great with my green purse - mucho colorful, no?

*Okay, want.
**Okay, wanted.

Posted by Bird On A Line @ 1:20 PM

Thursday, January 26, 2006

I'm Afraid

Why? Because I'm going to turn 30 in 23 days. My Mom cried when she turned 30. I was 11 at the time and I remember it well (so I was apparently traumatized by it). I'm a bit scared of February 19th this year. I know it's silly; Huz says it's what you make it and for him it was no big deal. But my thoughts inevitably go to what I haven't yet accomplished by my third decade of life. I work with medical students, Residents, Chief Residents, and Fellows who are MY.CURRENT.AGE. (or YOUNGER!). What am I? What have I accomplished? I am an administrative assistant with a slightly different title. Yes, I went back to college at age 27 and did well; yes, I've been successfully married for 11 years; yes, I've gone through a religious pilgrimage and have come out sane and still critically thinking. What else? I'm not in grad school, don't have a grad degree, don't have a career, don't have a house...

Ug. Sorry for that pity party. It's just something I'm working through right now.

Ahem. On a lighter note, most of these resonate with me. You?


1. Your houseplants are alive, and you can't smoke any of them.
2. Having sex in a twin bed is out of the question.
3. You keep more food than beer in the fridge.
4. 6:00 AM is when you get up, not when you go to bed.
5. You hear your favorite song in an elevator.
6. You watch the Weather Channel.
7. Your friends marry and divorce instead of "hook up" and "break up."
8. You go from 130 days of vacation time to 14.
9. Jeans and a sweater no longer qualify as "dressed up."
10. You're the one calling the police because those %&@# kids next door won't turn down the stereo.
11. Older relatives feel comfortable telling sex jokes around you.
12. You don't know what time Taco Bell closes anymore.
13. Your car insurance goes down and your car payments go up.
14. You feed your dog Science Diet instead of McDonald's leftovers.
15. Sleeping on the couch makes your back hurt.
16. You take naps sometime between noon to 6 PM!!!
17. Dinner and a movie is the whole date instead of the beginning of one.
18. Eating a basket of chicken wings at 3AM would severely upset, rather than settle, your stomach.
19. If you're a gal, you go to the drug store for ibuprofen and antacid, not condoms and pregnancy tests.
20. A $4.00 bottle of wine is no longer "pretty good stuff."
21. You actually eat breakfast food at breakfast time.
22. "I just can't drink the way I used to" replaces "I'm never going to drink that much again."
23. 90% of the time you spend in front of a computer is for real work.
24. You drink at home to save money before going to a bar. 25. You read this entire list looking desperately for one sign that doesn't apply to you and can't find one to save your sorry old butt.
BONUS: 26. When you find out your friend is pregnant you congratulate them instead of asking "Oh S*$# What Happened?"

Posted by Bird On A Line @ 10:48 AM

Even Huz Thinks I'm Weird

Read this. He's such a good writer and I'm such a good subject to make fun of, no?

Posted by Bird On A Line @ 10:15 AM

Wednesday, January 25, 2006

Parisian Idol

Watching American Idol last night was a mixed bag for me. I had to hit mute for the 5 minutes of Jerry Springer-esque garbage put on by the ho squeezed into the silver tube top. Puhlease. I tuned in to watch singing, not pimped up bitches putting on a cuss frenzy. Oh and the girl in her stripper-mommy's lingerie? Ew.

The show can be over as far as I'm concerned. Not because it's lacks entertainment - oh it is definitely entertaining - did you hear that horrible rendition of "Fame" and did you see the Michael Jackson white boy? Oh.My.Gawd. But I think it truly can be over because the winner is evident. Quite evident as far as I'm concerned. Paris Bennett was absolutely wonderful - she gave me shivers! She's beautiful, poised, and truly a professional with a strong, gorgeous voice that demands an audience (an awed one at that) - and it all comes in a cute, little 17 year-old package!

The show ends with this girl.

Posted by Bird On A Line @ 8:33 AM

Tuesday, January 24, 2006

Tea Bag Tuesday

Because I'm busy at work and really tired, this is all I can muster for today's post.

"If you want to make peace, don't talk to your friends. Talk to your enemies."

Posted by Bird On A Line @ 11:34 AM

Monday, January 23, 2006


Oh how I love sourdough bread. I have fond memories of eating a simple tomato sandwich on wonderfully tart bread with a little mayo and sprinkle of salt and pepper. Yum.

Do you have to buy a sourdough starter specifically from San Francisco to have authentic sourdough bread? Can I simply make a starter myself and see what kind of wild yeasts Nashville has to offer?


Posted by Bird On A Line @ 11:37 AM

Saturday, January 21, 2006


Living in the South, I have the distinct privilege of hearing the English language butchered, torn up, and abused on a regular basis. I thought I might share some grammar offences that I hear every day. I'll keep them coming because I don't think they'll ever stop.

"I don't want nobody to be late."

"How many cents is it?"

Posted by Bird On A Line @ 4:11 PM

Friday, January 20, 2006

Eating in the Dark

I was listening to NPR the other morning as I was driving to work and heard that London is opening up a second restaurant that is completely dark inside. Don't ask me how you are supposed to see your host walk you to your table or how your are supposed to find your mouth with your fork.

They said that diners frequently confuse veal for tuna.


I can think of other things I'd rather do in the dark.

Posted by Bird On A Line @ 3:02 PM

Thursday, January 19, 2006

Winter Watch! Warning: Ice Forms on Bridges First!

The night before last I kept having my t.v. show* interrupted with "Winter Watch" and "Snow Advisory" warnings scrolling over the screen. Oooooooh. Southerners are so funny when it comes to snow flakes or the mere thought of ice on the roads. When I used to live in Baton Rouge, there would be these signs on every bridge that warned of ice forming on bridges first. I don't think it got below 50 humid degrees in my four years there. Anyway, I woke up yesterday to the after effects of the huge snow storm that happened in the night. I don't know how I got to work alive!

Wow, Nashville, You Can Snow!

Wow, Nashville, You Can Snow!

Wow, Nashville, You Can Snow!

Can you believe they closed all of the schools for this!? It was all melted by 9a.m. and then it was a sunny 50 degree day. Not too reminiscent of my Colorado snow days.

*Okay, I admit it, it was American Idol.

Posted by Bird On A Line @ 7:10 AM

Wednesday, January 18, 2006

New Colors

So what do you think? Too much white? Boring tan? Let me know. I was just tired of the sage green.

Posted by Bird On A Line @ 9:14 AM

Tuesday, January 17, 2006

And Then There Was Light

Thanks Dad for the awesome Pottery Barn sconces! It's great to be able to read in bed without disturbing each other with the overhead light. Don't they look awesome in my bedroom?

The New Potterybarn Lights

Behold the Lights

Yes, I took the photographs over the bed (I set the focus and aperture then used a tripod and timer) and, yes, that's me in my birthday suit.

Posted by Bird On A Line @ 5:51 PM

Monday, January 16, 2006


The good thing about Nashville is that there are a lot of free concerts. Huz and I went to a friend's show a few weeks ago and were pleasantly surprised with Jen Dominguez's folk music. I particularly like "Majorette" which was written about her mother-in-law. Take a listen. She's a wonderful story teller and musician.

Posted by Bird On A Line @ 10:09 AM

Sunday, January 15, 2006

Sofa Innards

There are many things to know about a sofa before buying it. You can't base it on looks or a thirty-second sit in a furniture store. You have to start with its skeleton. Really, you do - if you want a quality piece of furniture that won't sag or squeak in five years or less. I'm avidly researching sofas because it'll be the first we've ever bought new as a married couple (yes, we've been married for 11 years but have only had hand-me-downs or bought used ones before) and I don't want to drop a grand on a sofa that is sub-par. I have found this site very helpful in learning how a sofa is constructed. If you are thinking about buying a piece of furniture, you really should take a look at it.

Yesterday I dragged Huz to about 5 furniture stores and we have two contenders at this point. One is a sofa I have lusted over for several months now (even though it's not leather, though I would die to have one of the leather club chairs to go with it). It's from (you guessed it) the mecca of great quality and much coveted household beauties: Pottery Barn. The other contender is from a local furniture store and is a leather sofa that isn't quite up to snuff with Pottery Barn quality, but is still a nicely built sofa with decent imported leather. The quandary remains, however, how much will Neville's wrestling around (which he does on a daily basis with his sister) scratch the leather? I don't know. I'm thinking of ways to protect this investment - get him declawed or try these plastic claw cover thingies.

I'm not in a hurry. There is no sale that is awesome enough to make me rush into this decision. So many questions. Leather? Microfiber? There are some things I know for sure though: 1. It has to have a kiln-dried hardwood frame with double dowel and glue/screw (not nail) construction; 2. it's best if it has non-detachable feet otherwise the integrity of the frame isn't as good; 3. it should have springs (either 8-way hand-tied or S-spring) as opposed to webbing, otherwise it will likely sag in five years; and 4. the cushions should be made with high-resistant foam (1.8 minimum) surrounded by a poly/down wrapping.

That's probably WAY more than you wanted to know about sofas, but if you're thinking of shelling out that kind of money, you need to know it's for the long run.

Posted by Bird On A Line @ 6:19 PM

Friday, January 13, 2006

Cats and Furniture

We're thinking about getting a leather couch. Cambie has no claws, but Neville has his back ones. Any of you had experience with leather and cat claws? I don't want to spend bookoo bucks and have it all scratched.

Advice is welcome.

Posted by Bird On A Line @ 9:49 AM

Wednesday, January 11, 2006

Quotable Insult

Me: "The strongest muscle in my body is so sore!"

Huz: "Your butt?"

Hmm, I think to myself. I did say "strongest" muscle, not "biggest" right? Should I get insulted? Probably not, but I will anyway.

Me: "My butt is not sore, it's my quads. I ran and they hurt. The end."

Posted by Bird On A Line @ 11:22 AM

Tuesday, January 10, 2006

The Shit List

Guess which member of my household is currently on my shit list...go ahead, guess.

You: "Could it be Huz?"

Um, no. Take a look at the fab dinner he made me last night.

Proscuitto-Wrapped Tilapia, Mashed Fingerling Potatoes, and Snow Peas Courtesy of the Best Husband Around

How could such an awesome man be on my shit list? This was prosciutto-wrapped tilapia, mashed fingerling potatoes, and snow peas. For what? No reason. He just likes to cook. (You may all heave a collective jealous sigh now.)

You: "How 'bout Cambridge?"

This sweet thing?

Sink Cat

No, not her either. In fact, ever since we got Neville she's been extra sweet and sleeps with on me in bed every night.

You: "That must leave Neville?"

Well, I know he looks awfully cute and innocent:


Where's the BBQ Sauce? I want to chew this cutie up!

Tabby Love

But I woke up this morning and discovered that he had a rather destructive evening whilst I was peacefully slumbering only feet away. Take a load of my new table runner, not to mention my poor plant which I found uprooted and lying on the chair.

Neville's Destructive Behavior (or Why He's on My Shit List)

Oh, and this was on the couch.

Neville's Destructive Behavior

Neville, can you say "dog?" You're a cat, man, act your species!

Posted by Bird On A Line @ 5:34 PM

Bachelor Blahs

I watched about 5 minutes of The Bachelor last night before I just couldn't stand it anymore. The ridiculous women who doll themselves up and parade around a man like a bunch of peacocks just makes me sick. The only reason I attempted to watch it at all is because I work at the same hospital as the guy and I may pass by him in the hall one day. But, no, I couldn't do it. The feminist inside of me was screaming in agony at the women who brought themselves down to stereotypical blondes.

Posted by Bird On A Line @ 8:40 AM

Thursday, January 5, 2006

Time With My Family

It's always been hard to say goodbye to my family after our short visits with them at Christmas, but it seems to be getting harder for me, especially as I consider starting a family of my own. I want my child to know his/her grandparents and aunts and uncles and cousins. It's important to me, especially because Huz was never very close to his extended family. I want to break this tradition, but don't know how if we live in a different state than all of our relatives. I'm really hoping that Huz will be able to get a teaching job closer to home. Do any of you struggle with this? I haven't lived in Colorado since I was 18 (over a decade now) and it's starting to bother me that I can't just call up one of my sisters and go shopping whenever I want to, or call up my Mom and have her over for dinner, or hang out with my biological father (Scott) and get to know him better, or go on motorcycle rides with my Dad, etc. Instead, I have to wait until December comes and then briefly fit them all into one short week, literally "penciling them in."

That's what's on my mind lately.

I did get some good pictures of the family while we were home, though, and I thought I'd share them here.

First, this is Scott. He is my biological father and due to an early divorce I don't know him very well, but we're trying. We had a nice breakfast together and caught up on some things. It was a good time.

Me and Scott

He's the one who has Mable. She's right here.


She is doing well and got a little playful when I came over for a visit. She's big and soft and I like her.

Here's my little sister KK and me having fun at a family cocktail party. She's a riot and I love hanging out with her.

The Gummy Smile Twins

This is her boyfriend, who I met for the first time last week. His name is Stephen and he's really cool. I approve! :)

My Little Sis

Here's KK and our cousin Nikki. I asked them to jingle their reindeer heads for me and they did.

Jingle Heads

Here's my Mom and her hubby Ed. They are a happy couple and they graciously hosted us again this year. Thanks you guys!

Happy Mom and Ed

This is my Mom. She's a lovely person as you can see by her smile!

Mom and Ed

This is one of my favorites - it's of my Mom, KK, and me.

Mom, KK, Me :)

I didn't take enough pictures of the other side of my family (why does that always happen!?). Grr.

Here's my Dad. He's the one who gave me the awesome Nikon D-70 with which I took all of these pictures. Sorry about the mid-sip shot, Dad!

Sipping Dad

Here's my middle sister, Jax. She's kind of crazy as you can see but, for the record, she just got off of work (she's a clown), hence the makeup. She and I are very different, but I look forward to getting to know her as an adult.


This is my sweet, little Grandma. She's my only grandparent left and I can't wait until she meets her great-grandchild (whenever that might be).

Grandma :)

This is my cousin juggling glowing balls of light. Pretty, huh?

Juggling Lights

So that's most of them (well, not really, but I didn't want to bore you). I had a great time visiting them all and I miss them already. I hope you all had a chance to spend some quality time with your loved ones over the holidays!

Posted by Bird On A Line @ 5:08 PM

Wednesday, January 4, 2006

Basic German

Here is some basic German that everyone should know:

oberaffentittengeil (pronounced: oh-ber ah-fen tit-ten gile)
This translates "horny as ape tits."

You're welcome.

Posted by Bird On A Line @ 4:39 PM

Tuesday, January 3, 2006

Because I Have No Shame

I tend to embarrass myself when I get together with friends. And, no, alcohol doesn't even have to be involved, though it does help speed up the embarrassment factor.

Take tonight for example.

The scene: friend's house for dinner with two other couples. No booze served until after dinner, once self-embarrassment was well under way.

First episode: Victoria is being silly, relaxing with friends after a heinous first day back at work after a nice long, lazy vacation. The subject of the dreaded South comes up and she immediately remembers the deplorable four years spent in Baton Rouge. The subject turns to southern food to which she pipes, "I'm just not into sucking heads."

Dead silence...then laughter...a few seconds pass before she realizes how this came out. Blushing commences.

Second episode: VW notices that after several hours of silliness and self-embarrassment, Huz is getting that Oh-My-God-I-So-Don't-Know-Who-This-Woman-Sitting-Next-To-Me-Is look on his face and she asks him if he still loves her. He answers the obligatory "Yes honey, of course," adding that when Victoria gets tired and silly she tends to revert to a 13 year-old. Unaffected she retorts, "Well, I just have a child inside of me!"

Dead silence...then laughter...a few seconds pass before she realizes how this came out. Blushing commences.

End Scene.

But, hey, at least this fine company I embarrassed myself in front of taught me how to say "horny as ape tits" in German!

Posted by Bird On A Line @ 9:13 PM

Monday, January 2, 2006

The Goods

I am happy to say that I am moving this KitchenAid Mixer from the "Wanting" category to the "Having" category thanks to Huz. Thanks for my cool mixer, babe! I'm looking forward to making ever so yummy things with it. :)

I will likely be getting two of these lights with the Pottery Barn gift card my Dad got me. Thanks Dad!

Finally, I'll be getting either this

or this

Waffle Maker

with the gift card that my Mom got me. Thanks Mo!

Feeling spoiled I am! :)

Posted by Bird On A Line @ 4:38 PM

Cats and Their Beds

Although I bought him one of his own, Neville loves Cambridge's bed. No, it's not any more comfortable than his, but serves as a point of competition between them: "It's MY bed!" "No, it's MY bed!"

As you can see, he won this round of the Cambie Bed Competition. Poor girl.

Neville won the bed this time.

Then Cambie beat him to it the next round. Instead of taking defeat, however, Neville decided to join her and shoved himself in beside her.


Then he decided it was too damn small.

Neville deciding that Cambridge's bed is too small for them both

And went begrudgingly to his own bed.

Neville in HIS bed

The End.

Posted by Bird On A Line @ 4:19 PM

Sunday, January 1, 2006

The Blog Commences

Hello blogosphere! I hope that you all had a great holiday and got to spend some time with family and friends like we did. We just got back from our beloved home state of Colorado and were much disappointed by the serious lack of a White Christmas, but we enjoyed time with our families regardless of the weather. Truth be told, it was really nice - the Colorado blue skies were as pretty as ever and we had lots of sun beaming on the rugged Rockies. We had a chance to go skiing for free (courtesy of my aunt), but we didn't end up going because we wanted as much time for visiting relatives as possible (though, as usual, I feel guilty for not spending enough time with a few of them). A lot happened on the trip - some good, some not so good, but I'm not sure what I will be sharing yet. I missed Cambridge and Neville the whole time and, like our last trip, Cambie came down with a viral infection of the eye. At least that's what I think it is - looks the same as when we got back from Europe in May. I'll take her to the vet tomorrow, if they're open. In the meantime, I'm giving her the same antibiotic eye gel that we used on her in May. Please send well wishes her way - my poor, sensitive girl! She can't stand for us to be gone! She and Neville seem to being doing just fine together - there's fighting, playing, licking, and sleeping by each other.

Posted by Bird On A Line @ 4:33 PM

My Food Blog

Quesadillas and Drinks


Nurse Jackie
United States of Tara
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True Blood
Curb Your Enthusiasm

Book Reading



Julie and Julia
Thirteenth Tale
Kite Runner
No Country For Old Men
The Road
What To Expect When You're Expecting
Water for Elephants
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Harry Potter and the Half Blood Prince
Baby Wise
Norwegian Wood
Rabbit Redux
Rabbit, Run
On Beauty
Cement Garden
Eat, Pray, Love
Cute, Quaint, Hungry and Romantic: The Aesthetics of Consumerism
The History of Love
Pure Style Living
All The Names
Collage Discovery Workshop
Hard-Boiled Wonderland and The End of the World
Fugitive Pieces
Taking Charge of Your Fertility
A 90 Day Guide...
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Fast Food Nation
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Black Dogs
Enduring Love
Harry Potter and the Half Blood Prince
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I Pretty Much Hate Everything
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Who Knew?
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Work It, Mom
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