Friday, April 28, 2006

Office Shmoffice

How you know your office is too small and that you wore the wrong shirt to work:

Upon taking your jacket off in the morning, the person who shares your office with you immediately says, "What's that on your shoulder!?" Then you blush and remember that you have a raging Huz hickey that is clearly visible in the sleevless shirt you wore.


Posted by Bird On A Line @ 9:59 AM

Thursday, April 27, 2006

What To Post On?

Let's see; a few things have happened that you might want to know about.

1. Wednesday night I was home alone because Huz was off studying with classmates at a local restaurant. How one can study in a loud pizza place is beyond me, but, then again, I'm not a professional student like he is. Anyway, I'm beginning to wonder why shit happens to me whenever he goes away (e.g., tornado warnings one night and locking myself out of the house another night - I haven't told you about that one yet, have I!?).

I'm not typically a scared person (well, okay, unless it's at night and he's not there and I'm trying to sleep when every mundane creek and crick of the house becomes very audible all of a sudden), but Wednesday night about freaked the shit out of me. I just finished watching American Idol and was going back to studying starting to watch House when a helicopter flew overhead. No big deal; we live several miles from Vanderbilt University Hospital and their Life Flight flies over the city from time to time. Well, the thing came back a few minutes later and then again and again and again. It was hovering, making circles, and shining a spotlight all around my neighborhood which promptly freaked me out because they were obviously looking for someone on the ground. I also began to hear booms (fireworks? gun shots? car back firing?) so I called the police to see what was going on. She told me that there were fireworks in the area but the helicopter was an unrelated incident. I asked if I should be concerned because I was home alone. Her response? "Shut and lock your doors and windows."

Fantastic. Nothing can make you feel more safe than to be given no information from the police other than to lock your doors and windows. I immediately turned off the t.v. and the lights and tip-toed around my house closing and locking all the windows. I felt like a prisoner in my own home. I tried to call Huz 8 times, but he never heard his phone ring in the loud pizza place. Ugh! I was pissed and afraid. My friends down the street came and got me and I hung out with them for a while, the helicopter continued its search all the while. I finally went home when it went away, but never found out what they were looking for.

Talk about unnerving! You expect that kind of thing in Chicago, not a small neighborhood in Nashville. Plus, in Chicago I was on the 3rd floor of an apartment building, not on the first floor of a house. Yeesh!

2. I went off the pill a week ago. (OMG!) I'm not really freaked out yet, actually, because we'll be protecting for several more months. But, come on, I've been on that medicine for ELEVEN YEARS, people! I have no idea how my body will be off of it. I don't know what to expect - zits (God forbid), weight loss, weight gain (God forbid), less moodiness, more moodiness (God forbid), less cramps, more cramps (God forbid)?

Somebody give me an AAAAGGGGGHHHHHHHH!!!!!

Posted by Bird On A Line @ 9:45 AM

Tuesday, April 25, 2006


I made this last night for dinner and it was awesome. It was a vegetarian meal, mostly organic, and oh so yummy.

Posted by Bird On A Line @ 12:29 PM

Sunday, April 23, 2006

Georgia On My Mind

I've got a lot of things on my mind lately (and, no, Georgia isn't really one of them. TN is South enough for me, thank you). It all started a few years ago when I read "The Jungle" by Upton Sinclair. Then, about a year ago, a PETA representative handed me a brochure on the way to a college class. I tucked it into my bag to peruse later, if at all. I looked at it and was horrified by the pictures of animals and how they are treated by our meat industry. I told myself that I should become a vegetarian because the treatment of animals, of which I call myself a lover, was utterly disgusting. I bought a book called "The Gradual Vegetarian" but never got around to reading it.

I recently read an article in Harper's magazine about the pork industry - an examination of the brutal, almost Brave New World-like manufacturing and breeding of animals for standardized meat. We, the consumers, expect to go to any grocery store in our country and find the same pale pink rectangle pork chops looking up at us under their Saran wrap blankets. This demand for homogenous meat has resulted in a mechanical, heartless industry where pigs live and die in a small indoor stall, forcing them to stand in one direction, eating on one end and defecating on the other end for their entire (unnaturally) short lives.

Then, coincidentally, I saw 'Super Size Me' which, if you haven't seen it yet, you should. It examines the corporate God otherwise know as McDonald's and its "food" that is far from good for you (did you know that after 9 weeks their french fries don't decompose?). What's worse than selling fatty, over-processed food and utilizing underpaid, non-Union workers, is how it markets to children. Kids are vulnerable and are still developing their tastes, which corporations exploit for their own benefit. They see kids as a means to an end - the end being huge profits if they can create a market in children who will continue to buy for the rest of their lives. I'm not saying that kids (or adults) are held at gun point and forced to dine at McDonald's or any other fast food chain, but the huge, multi-billion dollar corporations monopolize television commercials and now sponsor everything from sporting events to elementary and high schools, making it very difficult for local, independent restaurants to compete.

My first reaction to the article and the film were to finally become a vegetarian. I really don't know if I can make such a drastic change to a 30 year-old established diet, plus Huz doesn't want to become one which would make dinner-making a pain. I may eventually make the switch, but for now I will start by becoming a better consumer. I'd like to buy meat that is organic and grain-fed (did you know that cows, pigs, chickens, etc. are fed ground bones and guts of other cows, pigs, and chickens?). Ideally, I'll start buying meat from a local farm that specializes in the humane treatment of animals and is organic, like this one. Eating organic fruits and vegetables would also be a healthy step so that pesticides and growth hormones are longer part of my diet.

It's funny, but thinking about having a child has really been an incentive to make these changes. For one, I want to offer a healthy environment for a growing fetus, but I also want my child to be a conscious member of society who thinks about her food and where it came from before purchasing it or taking a bite of it. So that's my new goal, folks. I want to be a better consumer because I am partly responsible for the meat industry and the fast food empire. Why? Because I buy their products. If I don't like those products or how they are being produced and marketed, I shouldn't be buying them.

[Oh yeah, I forgot to mention that I'm reading "Fast Food Nation" which is VERY eye-opening about how our food market works. I highly recommend it.]

Posted by Bird On A Line @ 3:32 PM

Friday, April 21, 2006

Spam Dick

I'm tired of getting spam. At first it was all quiet when we got our nice, new gmail accounts. No junk mail, no spam. But then? BAM! Now I get a "tired of having a short dick?" email almost every day. Um, hello? My email address is my name and it's obviously a GIRL'S name.


Thank you.

Posted by Bird On A Line @ 2:32 PM

Thursday, April 20, 2006


It's rainy, work sucks, I've got cramps and I'm grumpy as hell.

How did I cheer myself up? I dropped my Human Anatomy II class this summer and instead added a black and white photography lab. Ahhhh. That's better!

Posted by Bird On A Line @ 1:21 PM

Tuesday, April 18, 2006

Repeats Suck

Don't you just hate repeats? You know, you get all syked that Lost is on and you settle down on the couch with the remote in your hand just to find out that it's like the 5th repeat in a row. Thankfully it's been better the last few weeks in t.v. land, but not so in Through My Lens land. Why? I'm too lazy/busy to post something fresh and original. But don't worry, it's a good one. People are still constantly finding my site through one of the pictures in the post. You can guess which one. Enjoy.

Posted by Bird On A Line @ 8:32 AM

Friday, April 14, 2006

The Weirdness That Is Me

Nobody tagged me for this* but I'll do it anyway.

3** Weird Things About Me That I Haven't Blogged About Yet:

1. I fall asleep MUCH earlier than I should. Half the time it's on the couch while I'm reading or watching the tube. Huz and I watch SNL every (surprise, surprise) Saturday and inevitably I'll wake up at 1 a.m. next to an also-sleeping husband and the t.v. will still be on. Or we'll be watching a Netflix movie (if Huz picked it it's destined to be a Russian film that is always b.o.r.i.n.g to the extreme, so I typically only see 10 minutes of it before the back of my eyelids). I'm only 30, but my bedtime is pretty much 10p.m.

2. I used to count things obsessively as a child. You know, stop signs, chairs around the table, the usual. But the thing is? I wouldn't just count them in my head. No. I had to click my teeth whilst counting. I'd be in the backseat and we'd pass a stoplight so I'd click my molars three times while I counted the lights (green, yellow, red). Thank God I outgrew that one.

3. I fart more than my husband. I know gender really has nothing to do with it, but we seem to think it does in our culture. I always tell him that he has a magical butt*** because mine is just incapable of swallowing farts like his is.

On a side (but oh so related) note, Neville is afraid of thunderstorms. Whenever we have anything remotely close to one he runs under the bed in terror. I got home from work the other day and was changing clothes in the bedroom. Neville, as is his custom, followed me into the room and was purring nearby. I let a fart rip and, you guessed it, he dashed under the bed.

You heard it here first, folks, Victoria farts like thunder.

*Sniff! :(
**It's supposed to be 6 but I don't want to scare you away.
*** It's cute AND magical - what a deal!

Posted by Bird On A Line @ 8:56 PM

Wednesday, April 12, 2006

Flowers and Their Shadows

I took a bunch of photos of a beautiful redbud bough that I brought inside from my front yard. They actually inspired the design change here at Through My Lens. In typical "Victoria must show photos to her friends" fashion, here they are.




Posted by Bird On A Line @ 10:04 AM

Tuesday, April 11, 2006

The Little Brush That Could

When I was at The Cat Shoppe with a friend a few weeks ago, I passed by a rack of cat brushes. My friend picked up a rubber one and told me to get it because it was awesome. Whoever thought of making a brush out of rubber!? I wasn't convinced, but bought it anyway.

Well now. This little guy means business.

Check out how much freaking cat hair I get out every time I use it - soon my kids will be bald.

The Little Cat Brush That Could

The Little Cat Brush That Could

I offered to make Cambridge a sweater out of both her and Neville's fur and she was all, "Oh my god, Mom, would you!? That would be, like, totally AWESOME!!!"

Oh My God Look

Posted by Bird On A Line @ 10:47 AM

Saturday, April 8, 2006

Scenes From a Tornado Warning

Here are some pictures I snapped during all the tornado scares yesterday.

Red=bad and that's where I live.

Tornado Warning

Ominous skies abound.

Tornado Warning - Ominous Sky

Tornado Warning - Ominous Sky

I threw the cats in a carrier and a bicycle helmet on my head then headed for an inner hallway.

Home alone & waiting for a tornado


Posted by Bird On A Line @ 2:46 PM

Friday, April 7, 2006

Tornado Warnings

I'm scared. The air is still, the birds are quiet, and the tornado alarms are going off. They let us off of work 2 1/2 hours early so I went home to protect my cats. Huz is out of town and I'm home alone. I grew up in the mountains; we didn't have to deal with this. What do I do? Jump in the tub with my cats? Put my bicycle helmet on? Jump into a closet? Every room in my house has a window and I don't have a basement.


[I'm okay and Huz is okay. 19 tornados moved through middle Tennessee yesterday afternoon. 167 homes in Gallatin (not too far from Nashville) were destroyed and 40 in another town nearby. I transported the cats to a friend's house so that I wouldn't be alone. They were okay, but a bit stressed and I left them in their carriers for an hour. Then I went back home and got their catbox and food and let them loose in my friend's study. Cambie was very upset because of the smell of the resident cat and started to hiss and growl at Neville (I think she thought he was the stranger cat). I decided to bring them back home because it was way too stressful for them. I ended up staying home then because the storms had moved south of Nashville at that point. It was pretty scary because I've never dealt with tornados before AND because Huz was out of town. What a way to start the weekend, eh!?]

Posted by Bird On A Line @ 3:18 PM

Thursday, April 6, 2006

The Goat Cat Strikes Again

My cats are very different from one another. One inhales his food, the other eats one piece of food at a time. One is a bit on the lazy side when it comes to playing with toys:

Lazy Player

Lazy Player

The other is a very active player of toys:

Active Player

Active Player

One loves dried shrimp, the other prefers dried herring.

One enjoys cat food. The other? Not so much.

He prefers flip flops.

The Goat Cat Strikes Again

Posted by Bird On A Line @ 6:00 PM

Wednesday, April 5, 2006

T.V. Post #2

Also? Mandisa should totally NOT been voted off tonight. That girl has some of the best pipes on the show - too bad people vote based on looks (and weight) rather than singing talent.

Dumb Shits.

Posted by Bird On A Line @ 9:22 PM

An Island in the Mind

So, have we all been sucked into the constructed reality of a crazy fat man?
I'm not sure. Thoughts?

I certainly hope that's not the case because I'll have been duped - is Dharma getting into my brain too? Sheesh.

There are some really great reviews written about Lost here. Read them and you'll be left more confused (yet intrigued) than ever.

Posted by Bird On A Line @ 9:15 PM

Sunday, April 2, 2006

Ear Orgasm

My ears are having an orgasm right now. Really, they are. And it's not because I have anything in them (Q-Tip, banana, bean, etc.).

Why then?

Because they are enjoying the soft hum of the new DISHWASHER we bought today! It's been 8 long years without one and when I spotted a 4 month old portable dishwasher on Craigslist going for half the retail price, I jumped on it.


Posted by Bird On A Line @ 6:27 PM

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