Through My Lens

Saturday, May 14, 2005


I've been kinda negligent with the posts of late. It's not that I've been busy or anything, on the contrary, I've been sitting on my ass in front of the t.v. with nothing to do (I know, I can't just be happy that I graduate from college next weekend - I have to be bored and complain about it to the whole world).

So, what cool story should I share? I know, I'll tell you about my crazy neighbor, "Crazy Joan." Said crazy woke me up this morning with her furious clapping of hands and 15 minute growl session. I'm not kidding. This woman growls like an animal down there. I thought about doing a lot of things to shut her up, like stomping on the floor and putting my face to the rug, yelling, "Joan, I can hear you. Shut up!" I also wanted to put a note under her door that said, "Humans do not growl. Knock it off." I also thought about sticking a fishing pole out of the window, lowering a sign down that said, "Shut it, animal!" But I didn't. I just laid there and tried to go back to sleep, which didn't happen.

I'm getting frustrated with the job situation. I finally have a college degree, so I do not want to be somebody's yes-woman anymore (i.e., secretary - no offense to any of you who may be one). I should move up from here, but so far nobody in Nashville has called me back and I fear that I'll have to apply for these kinds of positions. One place said I'd hear from them by yesterday. Well, yesterday is gone and I have yet to hear from them. sigh

I also hate that I'm 29 and still have 4 years of school ahead of me before I can be in a career with decent money and security that will allow us to start trying to have a family. The baby fever came on me about 2 years ago, but obviously I was trying to finish my undergrad so I didn't do anything about it. Unfortunately, now isn't a good time either (is there ever a "good time?") because Huz will be a student for another 4-5 years, with no income to speak of (other than a small stipend). What's a girl to do? What have you done? I want both a career and to have a child. I'm worried if I wait too long it will be really hard (case in point: I have a friend who is a few years older than me and after 2 years of trying, she had to do en vitro. Another friend my age has just had 2 miscarriages). I know there's no way to tell if I'll have trouble conceiving or not, but I'm scared that I'm risking it because of my desire to be somebody in this world (i.e., have a career). Advice from those of you who have done both successfully is wholeheartedly welcome.

I guess this was a ranting post, but sometimes we have to just let it out, right?
Thanks for bearing with me!

Posted by Bird On A Line @ 6:11 PM

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